The Zombie Apocalypse is Coming.

Yes, you heard me right, walkers will soon be at your doorstep and they’re hungry. “Knock knock!” Who’s there? “BRAINS!!”

The zombie craze is nothing new, though in recent years it has reached such epic proportions that even the CDC has released documentation on zombie apocalypse preparedness.

This onset of zombie fever has sparked a slew of walking dead-themed races, including the Zombie Run, a race held at numerous locations around the country. For Nanolumens, the nearest race location is in Perry, GA at the Guardian Center– an 830-acre disaster training facility used by many organizations including countless fire departments and military groups.

Upon finding this amazing race, a few of us couldn’t resist the idea of putting a team together to take a stab at running from the undead. We couldn’t resist this challenge: “Anyone can run, but it all changes when you are running for your life from a horde of hungry, merciless zombies. Test your speed, cunning and endurance in this one of a kind zombie infested run.”

Sign me up.

At Nanolumens, we strive to maintain a team-focused culture, and events such as this only strengthen that intense level of camaraderie and, more importantly, trust. In the Zombie Run, you must work as a team and make sacrifices if necessary. The event is much like a flag football game but runners are given multiple flags that are snatched away by the Zombie horde infecting the route.  In order to receive your Survivor medal, at least one team member must have a flag intact at the end of the race.

So, did Nanolumens leave the race infected or were we survivors? Our three runners share their version of events below. Be warned, though. The following accounts are not for the squeamish (just kidding, it’s totally safe.)

Sarah Shelnut, Demand Generation Manager:

“I’m a regular runner, though I’m not a great or fast runner. While preparing for this race I knew that I had a very important job ahead of me: the sacrificial lamb. What exactly is the sacrificial lamb? Well, it’s the absolute most important job on the team. In an effort to save the flags of my teammates, I threw myself in front of the walking dead in order for my flags to be taken before those of my colleagues. In a race like this, your flags are your lifeline—and I gladly sacrificed mine in order to be the hero of the Nanolumens team.”

Status: Infected

Dan Rossborough, Architectural Solutions Engineer:

“Clearly the strategy was simple. The anatomy of this particular crisis was similar to that of a bear attack in the wilderness. In short, we don’t have to outrun the zombies, we just have to outrun the other guy. We identified some weak links in the crowd and positioned ourselves to have ample slow-moving food sources around us as we approached the hungry hordes. Drawing on my inner Barry Sanders and what’s left of my physical prowess I proceeded to dash through the zombies using every spin move, high step and head fake I had left in my arsenal.

As our food shield waned facing the final zombie gauntlet we had to make an executive decision on how (or whom) to distract the remaining flesh eaters. The final zombie demographic featured some rather frisky looking recently-turned formerly-male biters so we offered up our best option for appealing to what was left of their human appetites. Objective decision making was the key to our survival; Sarah will be sorely missed.”

Status: Survivor

Patrick Osborne, Marketing Coordinator

I found the zombie run to be a breeze due to my ingenuity. It only took me days to come up with a perfect solution after I heard about the parade. I knew I would need to cloak myself. I spent hours building a semi casual meat coat and stuffed my pants pockets with heaps of raisins. In hindsight, I see that I should have made my coat out of something other than bologna which lacks structural integrity. The coat did not make it out the front door before it fell apart so I certainly did not look the part when I arrived at the parade. That was ok though. I decided to steal other runners flags while walking along ensuring that I would be a winner at the end. I won.

Status: Survivor (though we have no idea why!)